Labour really needs to up its Scandal Game

As everyone expected, the current government is starting to achieve some initial scandals and policy mistakes. Being not used to this kind of corrupting power, they should be given a reasonable amount of time before they get fully into it, maybe even allow for the Conservative debacles to quieten down so they are not compared too much with them. They really did set a really low standard and that will be hard to beat.

Some early personal tax shenanigans by Angela Raynor are pretty lame compared with Nadhim Zahawi rocking up with his seven figure settlement.

They seem to intend to not increase certain taxes as outlined in their manifesto…..they should be pulling a full Johnson and breaking that pledge like a de Pfeffel wedding vow.

Keir Starmer himself should be leading the way, failing to declare gifts properly from a donor is noob stuff - aim for lavish holidays, stupid wallpaper and golden drinks trollies.

If you are going to exploit renters, don’t have a middleman to blame, get in there painting over that mould yourself whilst threatening eviction at the slightest complaint and own it.

If you want to kill old people, don’t just take £300 off them, do it properly and feed care homes with infected pensioners and get those bodies piling up.

We want to see some proper good old-fashioned systemic bullying, not just psychological stuff. There doesn’t seem to be a single known sexual predator in a senior role. This is basic stuff Keir - get it sorted. We got used to professionals, and we won’t stand for anything less.

Picture credit: Wix AI

BBC News increasingly desperate for non-election stories

The news room is well-stocked with general election stories right now.  Party press offices are spewing out media opportunities, propaganda and policy tit-bits at a rate of knots.   There are plenty of election stories, non-stories and scandals (real and imagined) to fill the news bulletins.

The dilemma is how to balance the furious electioneering with something a bit more light-hearted. On the local news, it is fairly easy. Cat stuck up tree. Tree stuck up cat. Man immersed in beans/prawns/sewage to raise money for charity/motorhome/dying relative. Local businessman banged up again. Local issues with cladding/waiting lists/housing issues. No problem. But finding non-election stores at national level is harder.

Editors have been advised to try and find fun stories about, for example, animals, the environment, historical sex abuse scandals, and funny shaped vegetables (as long as there is a national context). If desperate, they are advised to run stories about anniversaries (85 years since the invention of string) or ‘national-day-of’ stories or things they found on TikTok.

The final option is to admit defeat - run the election stories, and then end the news bulletin twenty minutes early.  And then fill the gap with the potter’s wheel or the test card. The public will be grateful. And somebody might win a Bafta.

image from pixabay

Post Office paid Paula Vennells 5 million pounds to know nothing about anything

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