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NASA 'starting to regret' contracting Avanti




'We were go for launch, then an announcement came over the intercom,' complained a senior NASA manager. 'Some BS about not enough staff to drive the rocket. I tried to over-ride the instruction because there wasn't supposed to be any staff on-board, just dummies - which Avanti insist on calling stewards. Then they claimed the contactless machine wasn't operating correctly so snacks and drinks couldn't be purchased. Eventually they said a bus replacement service would be in operation and asked everyone to be patient.


'The good news is we're entitled to make a claim on their website. Apparently we're good to claim $54 billion plus a free bacon roll next time we travel with them.'


Nasa giant new Moon rocket looks awfully like a d$ck




The space agency denied they were overcompensating but acknowledged they had accepted a sponsorship deal with Viagra. The new rocket is twice as large as the space shuttle, but only half as long as Errol Flynn.


To a packed conference, NASA said: ‘Yes, it’s got length. But it’s also got girth. Stop giggling at the back! It’s got 15% more thrust. Stop it! And it is filled with spacemen, not seamen as some bright spark scribbled on my notes.


‘Frankly, this penis obsession is puerile nonsense. The kind of immature speculation you would expect from those with school-boy humour. We are very proud of Starship Dildo.’



Image from Pixabay by RJA 1988


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