Reform UK leader, Nigel Farage, today revealed that his latest tirade about migrants eating swans in Royal Parks were in fact a smokescreen for his own swan meat addiction.
"I can no longer keep it a secret", he told a hushed and visibly shocked group of reporters, "my vilification of immigrants, whilst correct in many ways, should not hide the fact that I have had a swan meat addiction for many years."
Mr Farage went on to to detail that he had started eating swan when offered it at a party by a minor Royal that he would not name. The Royal had told Farage that ingesting the swan would make him feel "more Royal and more British" and that the Queen and Prince Phillip regularly held swan meat parties that the Royal could introduce Farage to.
"I quickly found out that this was merely a ruse to get me addicted to eating swan, or 'chasing the queen's flock' as it's known amongst other addicts", said Mr Farage, "As my appetite grew, so did the demands for more and more money and favours. I wish I never met him at that Pizza Express"
Image: Couleur - Pixabay