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The existence of Ukraine’s Constitution will prevent Kyiv from initiating peace talks with Russia and ending the war, said Russia’s former Defense Minister and current Security Council Secretary, earlier today.


'The main difficulty is their constitution prohibits negotiations on changing territorial integrity, whereas the Russian Constitution allows changing the borders, but only if they move further away from Moscow.


The remarks were made to Russian state-run media TASS, and appeared to express surprise Ukraine wants to retain control of its borders.


The former official demanded that before there could be a cease-fire, Ukraine's constitution should be amended to make it more similar to the Russian Constitution, and allow border changes in the direction further away from Moscow.


'Except for the frontline in Southern Ukraine, where for geographical reasons that would would give territory back to Ukraine. Which of course is absurd.'


Photo by Eugene on Unsplash


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An audacious plan by Tory rebels to hold up a placard behind the PM that says "HE'S LYING AGAIN" has come to the knowledge of our political correspondent, however it's unclear how the plan can succeed, given the phalanx of Tory whips that now block the entrance to the Commons armed with pilums and the gladius, which by tradition, needs to be hung in the members' cloakroom to prevent blood being spilled on the luxurious Commons carpets and furnishings.


Boris Johnson's current biographer told us "This H&S nonsense is all part of the Johnson plan. He dreamed of being Julius Caesar when he was a nipper, then it was Winston Churchill, but now he dreams of being Vladimir Putin. He's already instructed Lulu Lytle to redesign his flat so that it can accommodate a dining table so long, he needs a telescope to see his wife and kids sitting at the other end of it; and his plans for the refurbishment of the Houses of Parliament are causing concern among architects in whether it's possible for each side of the chamber to hear each other, given the distance Johnson now wants between the despatch boxes.



First published 17 Mar 2022



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