Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelensky has been considering his clothing options ahead of a meeting with Donald 'The Grump' Trump - a man so old that he believes all young whippersnappers should be wearing a suit and tie. There was some ludicrously feigned outfit outrage manufactured after their previous meeting.
Zelensky has considered matching the Tangerine Abomination's get up, with a dark suit and red tie that is weirdly too long, to confuse Trump into believing that they are Presidents of one anothers countries.
Alternatively, Zelensky might sellotape a piece of paper to his t-shirt with the words 'The Epstein List' written in a font big enough to be read by the watching cameras. As a back up to this idea, one advisor suggested that in order to really pique Trump's interest, Zelensky should dress as a 14 year old girl.
