In a covert mission carried out under the dead of right-wing press fawning, Still Prime Minister Boris Johnson has personally napalmed Peppa Pig World at Paultons Park.
The official line from the Ministry of Defending the Indefensible is that there was a clear and present threat to the UK from woke snowflake cartoon characters. However, people not as high on the nutter scale have pointed to an act of retribution for Peppa Pig not signing a trade deal with the UK government, coupled with a building vengeance from the Prime Minister for not being allowed back on any of the rides.
The mission has been declared a complete success as collateral damage from the precision targeted strike destroyed all of the New Forest and most of Hampshire, leaving Peppa Pig World completely unharmed.
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