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Energy crisis solved by spinning magnet made from perpetual sexist and racist Tory Member repulsion

The Conservative party faithful have been plunged into disarray by a leadership run-off between 'a darkie and someone with a vagina'. The loathing amplified for both types of 'undesirable' by a Conservative government hellbent on a disgusting strategy of societal division, has come back to bite like the Ouroboros snake endlessly chomping down on its own tail.

The 'shocking' prospect of a Prime Minister who isn't white or a man, has sent some Tory members into a ceaseless spin of revulsion. But a mad old inventor from Basingstoke has harnessed this dark force and converted it into a source of energy.

'All you need is a fully paid up Tory bigot,' said Professor Blake. 'You give them just two options they equally despise, and they start to spit and froth, turning away from each with equal force. You then construct a housing made from material manufactured by GB News, the Daily Mail, the Express and the Telegraph, and that really ramps up the hatred revolutions per minute.

'Gather a few Conservative member fuel rods together and connect them in a series of right-wing echo chambers, and you could power the UK on pure intolerance for the next thousand years.'

image from pixabay

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