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Jeremy Hunt diverts entire GDP into his own constituency

Chancellor Jeremy Hunt introduced a reorganisation of the British economy in Wednesday's budget which involved slashing all spending departments budgets to zero and funnelling the resulting one trillion pounds into the constituency of Godalming and Ash. This will fund a controversial "Vote Conservative and get a hundred million pounds in your back pocket" scheme for the voters of Godalming and the surrounding villages.


Mr Hunt denied any suggestion of Gerrymandering: "It's pure chance that the finances ended up like this. I didn't even know it was my constituency until it was pointed out by my wife, Lucia, that it's where I live."


According to pollsters Yougov's interviews, the new scheme has affected people's voting intentions as one voter explained; "I certainly plan to tell him I voted for Conservative and claim the money. Obviously, I'll actually vote LibDem." confirmed Mrs L. Hunt of Godalming.


image from pixabay

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