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MP’s to be paid in fresh organs

The Independent Parliamentary Standards Authority has recommended MPs’ salaries include the still warm giblets of voters and a range of human-sourced fois gras. Instead of £10,000, they will be remunerated with ‘flesh of the proletariat’.

A spokeswoman explained: ‘The new opt-out system of organ donation has led to an excess of innards. Logically the most practical use of this ‘organ mountain’ is to sate the cannibalistic urges of Members of Parliament; matching supply with demand’.


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