Financial cuts mean that the BBC's Newsnight is stopping all investigative journalism in favour of two talking heads shouting 'let me be clear' and 'if you'll just let me finish' over each other, on a loop.
Tory intern Henry Hootington-Hurst said 'Most print media is already pretty pro Tory, but the pinko BBC doesn't yet do our bidding with sufficient obsequiousness. However, if we gut their budget, they can't investigate all of our massive scams - including that one. At least 50% of Tory MPs and Peers should probably be in jail. That percentage doubles for past and present cabinet ministers.'
Newsnight will now finish by broadcasting the Hallelujah chorus over an image of the Tory party logo, followed by the Benny Hill theme over a boot stamping on a human face, forever.
image from pixabay