Blair himself is said to have welcomed the new role and admitted that his skeletal grin will help him to fit right in. In fact, one Bible scholar explained that his coming had been foretold; 'And lo, I looked and beheld a white horse. And upon that horse, sat a smug, warmongering arsehole.'
A spokesman said: 'Having exhausted all the potential irony in being described as a ‘Peace Envoy’, Mr. Blair will now represent the final sign of impending doom; that of a 'Patronizing Git'. Bringing about the end of the world will be tricky but he has already made a head start’.