A rather quizzical British Prime Minister left the Brussels summit, arm in arm with an equally confused Greek PM. Having promised to leave the talks with an improved deal for the UK, a sheepish PM left, now the proud owner of a bankrupt Greek economy, seven cans of old paint and a four pack of AA batteries ‘with two missing’.
Some cynics have suggested that the EU has used the situation to unload a lot of unwanted ‘tat’ on an unsuspecting UK. But the Prime Minister looked ebullient waving a wire coat hanger and an old bathmat overhead. Clutching a bin-liner filled with expired medicines and indiscriminate power cables, the PM declared the discussions a great success.
His spokesman agreed: ‘These treaty concessions and old greeting cards left by the Belgium Finance Minister, are the spoils of victory. This Betamax cassette is a tribute to the Prime Minister’s negotiating skills. Let no man sneer at these…what are they? Oh, yes – these, lovely, used makeup-sponges - that he has won’.
Addressing onlookers, the PM assured them that he had struck a good deal: ‘I hold in my hand, four magic beans. I believe these to be peas in our time.’
