The news written by you…

Scientists finally create a dog that is just for Christmas

doesn't even need batteries‘Puppies are so cute, but those last 14 years or so can really drag.’

Read more >

Sports cars to display drivers’ penis size

Jeremy Clarkson downgrading to a 1.3 Renault.

Read more >

House of Lords ‘small benefit’ to the UK, conclude immigrants and refugees

The House of Lords has had ‘little or no positive impact’ on the well-being of the average Briton, an influential committee of migrants and refugees has said today.

Read more >

Large sums of money hold press conference to express ‘joy’ at Python reunion

silly walkers‘I for one can’t wait to be joining John Cleese’s offshore bank account once again,’ said a cheque for an estimated £1.72 million pounds.

Read more >

Lego Bible latest; only nine disciples located

Mary Magdalen was in the garden and Pontius Pilate turned up in the washing machine.

Read more >