The news written by you…

Men relish denouncing 1970s sexism while still repeatedly saying ‘tits’

Deep, meaningful, respectful, thoughtful, pert observation somewhere round here Phworr, let’s get our Raleigh Choppers out

Read more >

New York cop looks forward to retirement after uneventful last week at work

not a single drug-crazed, gun-toting mugger encountered on his entire walk home Buried ‘up to his ass’ in paperwork all week

Read more >

Middle aged gangsta rappers switching to gin and tonic

Gin and tonic before lunch is well phat

Read more >

US announces staged withdrawal from ‘spillage in aisle 14’

still considering pre-emptive strike on Lidl Starting with 12,000 troops leaving the Jams, Spreads, Preserves and Marmalades aisle

Read more >

False widow spider ‘ate my dog’

choose your pets wisely, and train them in martial arts Two unsuspecting American tourists were lynched

Read more >