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Welcome to the NewsBiscuit Writers' Room 0 Nice Admin Lady 02.12.13 11:19pm
Nice Admin Lady
‘We could still rip your throat out’ warn dogs

A pair of cute looking dogs have warned people that despite looking like a pair of over preening drag queens they could still rip your throat out., ‘It’s just so you know how things stand...

0
Gerontius 17.08.18 7:27am
Gerontius
‘Caution him, Governor!’ Jack Whitehall cast as Jack Reagan in Sweeney 2

more to follow...

0
Myke 17.08.18 6:15am
Myke
Prison security boost as Minister pulls £10m out of his arse

more to follow...

0
Myke 17.08.18 5:30am
Myke
Aretha Franklin dies on same date as Elvis. Apparently. 1
throngsman 17.08.18 5:28am
Myke
Restaurant staff to be barred from asking hypothetical questions after Brexit

The government has announced its first major initiative for post Brexit Britain. 'No more being asked if you'd like to see the bill, then being left twiddling your thumbs for half an hour until you...

1
throngsman 17.08.18 5:25am
Myke
Amazon launch Local High Street theme park

Come to the "Local High Street Theme Park" today! See how people lived before delivery drones. Buy something, just by speaking and handing over some coupons. See the beggars, addicts and muggers....

0
MzWibble 16.08.18 10:28pm
MzWibble
Homeopethic medics appeal for a jar big enough to dilute a truck 1
MzWibble 16.08.18 9:26pm
Benvoleo
Corbyn photobombs opening ceremony of Auchwitz.

"I was just standing there" He said, when shown remarkable photos from the 1940s. I wasn't aware of an opening ceremony, or the purpose of the site....

0
MzWibble 16.08.18 9:25pm
MzWibble
Corbyn: "I didn't realise Tony Blair was also a member of the Labour Party" 1
tamoshanter 16.08.18 9:15pm
MzWibble
Toaster bust 0
Guido Drapatolli 16.08.18 7:28pm
Guido Drapatolli
‘£76,000 Per Badger….Very Reasonable’ says government

A group of enterprising farmers stand to make a fortune if the government pays them the going rate for dead badgers currently set at £76,000 each. Animal rights activists and badger cuddlers fear...

0
Candide 16.08.18 7:00pm
Candide
RESPECT. 5
ron cawleyoni 16.08.18 4:03pm
Max Stars
A-level students baffled by use of alphabet to report record results

What should have been a joyful moment for the nation's A-level students, celebrating yet another year of record results, has been spoiled by the fact that many of them don't know which letters come...

1
YaBasta 16.08.18 3:54pm
Paul L
Britain’s slum landlords the best in the world claims Government

In response to a number of negative reports compiled by Shelter and other charities the Governments Communities Secretary today defended Britain’s slum landlords as being the best in the developed...

1
tonymc81 16.08.18 3:25pm
Myke
Bentos guilty of affray 1
nickb 16.08.18 3:20pm
Myke
Dad in a stable condition after asking for ‘boot cut’ fit jeans in River Island

A Daventry dad was expected to make a full recovery, after being laughed out of River Island for asking if they had any jeans in a ‘more generous cut’, it was revealed today. 45 year old dad of...

1
chrisf 16.08.18 2:43pm
Paul L
A-level students delighted as results are read out to them-innit 0
tonymc81 16.08.18 2:37pm
tonymc81
Ice Cream parlour man refuses Hand Job at shake interview

more to follow...

0
tonymc81 16.08.18 2:26pm
tonymc81
Ice Cream parlour man refuses Hand Job at shake interview

more to follow...

0
tonymc81 16.08.18 2:25pm
tonymc81
Ipswich fans deny disrupting Yorkshire rail track. 0
ron cawleyoni 16.08.18 2:02pm
ron cawleyoni
Well known homeopathic doctor killed in cycle crash

Calls for emergency supplies of highly diluted oil of jasmine to be stored at busy intersections...

0
YaBasta 16.08.18 1:50pm
YaBasta
PM to join ‘Strictly’..She’ll dance to anyones tune except ours say Rees-Mogg 2
ron cawleyoni 16.08.18 1:37pm
ron cawleyoni
Rail passengers facing major delays following tractor derailment 0
DavidH 16.08.18 1:28pm
DavidH
Police confirm man bitten by dog "not terrier related". 0
riesler 16.08.18 12:32pm
riesler
Rods Auction: First Lot is The Cheapest...(Baby I Know) 0
ron cawleyoni 16.08.18 12:24pm
ron cawleyoni
Fans caught-short for toilet sold Ed Sheeran tickets at hugely inflated prices

more to follow...

0
Myke 16.08.18 12:09pm
Myke
Bond film renamed 'Mr No' after character admits to lying about PhD 1
sydalg 16.08.18 11:49am
Myke
Rod Stewart auctions handbags and glad rags

commode and stair lift to follow...

0
Myke 16.08.18 11:47am
Myke
Freak show to feature non-tattooed lady. Answers to 'Theresa' 1
throngsman 16.08.18 11:43am
sydalg
Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Delight as next Mama Mia movie confirmed as the last

Following the baffling success of musicals, Mama Mia and Mama Mia - Here we go Again, purveyors of tawdry old cinematic guff, Bjorn Ulvaeus and Benny Andersson have confirmed, rather astonishingly,...

2
Chipchase 16.08.18 10:40am
ron cawleyoni