The NewsBiscuit Writers' Room
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Everything on these pages has been submitted by readers of the site and appears here unedited. Potential front page stories as well as one-liners for the ticker bar are welcome, so if you would like to write for NewsBiscuit please post your article on this submission board and then attempt to give yourself maximum votes over and over again. The most prolific and successful contributors will be considered for the coveted title of 'Writer of the Month'.
Check the following links for info: Guidelines for writers, Writer of the Month, Help with posting.
| Topic — Add New » | Comments | Votes | Author | Last Comment |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Welcome to the NewsBiscuit Writers' Room | 0 | Nice Admin Lady | 02.12.13 11:19pm Nice Admin Lady |
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| Couple claim family life rejuvenated by husband's decision not to wear a belt 'It has changed our lives,' Mitch Kenny says, talking about the decision he made one morning never to wear a belt again. His wife Jat, sitting next to her husband, agrees. 'It was the catalyst for us... |
2 |  |
Paul L | 04.08.20 2:27pm Paul L |
| Astonishing efforts in WWII cracked the code, but now lots of us speak German | 0 | |
SteveB | 04.08.20 2:13pm SteveB |
| Suspicious man spotted not performing sex act at dogging site Doggers in the Lake District have been warned to be on the lookout for a white male around 40 years old seen lurking around open-air sex venues showing no evidence of lewdness. Doggers Stacey Betts... |
3 | |
sydalg | 04.08.20 1:57pm sydalg |
| 'Foreign' Juan Carlos first expulsion from Tommy Robinson’s brave new Spaingland | 2 | |
Filthy Rich | 04.08.20 1:37pm Filthy Rich |
| Pizza Express Woking not to close in case Andrew wants a̶n̶ ̶a̶l̶i̶b̶i̶ a pizza | 1 | |
Mick Turate | 04.08.20 1:16pm Filthy Rich |
| Man who thought his wallet was full discovered to have giant tumour | 0 | |
sydalg | 04.08.20 12:35pm sydalg |
| The Third TitusSpam Thread [[i]New thread started as previous 'Ticker Submissions' thread had moved on to a second page[/i]], _ _ _ 'Mars Probe Finds "Nothing To see - Go Away" Scratched On Rock', [i] - Hat-tip to Wren in... |
17 | |
Titus | 04.08.20 11:55am Titus |
| The spread of Stacey Dooley surpasses Covid-19 Scientists have warned that by the end of 2020, one hundred percent of all TV listings will be infected with some part of Luton's answer to Woodward & Bernstein. Sightings of Dooley on our... |
0 | |
Wrenfoe | 04.08.20 11:29am Wrenfoe |
| Pizza Express may close 67 outlets..Andrew sweating over lack of alibis. | 1 | |
ron cawleyoni | 04.08.20 11:19am Terry Bunn |
| Anguished cry heard coming from Windsor: “Please, no- not Woking!” Sweaty, placard-bearing man later seen abseiling from helicopter in vicinity of Goldsworth Road... |
0 | |
Filthy Rich | 04.08.20 11:11am Filthy Rich |
| The Ghislaine Maxwell Academy for Young Ladies unlikely to reopen in September Despite frothing ministerial insistence that opening all schools in September is an absolute priority and far more important than boosting the nations alcohol intake, it remains unclear if one of the... |
3 | |
oshaughnessy | 04.08.20 11:06am oshaughnessy |
| Nation’s pigeons ‘healthiest ever, hardly leprously scabby at all’ reports RSPB Thanks to lockdown, a clearly made-up RSPB report confirms that Britain’s pigeons are currently enjoying their best levels of health and fitness since tangoing with German bombers over the channel... |
0 | |
Filthy Rich | 04.08.20 11:00am Filthy Rich |
| Bowling alley staff threaten strike action | 1 | |
oshaughnessy | 04.08.20 10:52am Filthy Rich |
| Hipster hits out at face mask rules after choking on own beard Hackney based hipster and artisan cress cafe owner Mycroft Green, has launched a campaign against face masks, after inadvertently swallowing his own beard while wearing one. Green, 27, was... |
1 | |
TheNewsWalrus | 04.08.20 10:51am Filthy Rich |
| "I'm amazed Liam Fox is a bit of an idiot" says nobody The revelation that Liam Fox's email was hacked by getting him to click on a phishing link has taken the country by expected. One security expert explained how the scam worked; "A foreign agency... |
4 | |
apepper | 04.08.20 10:49am Filthy Rich |
| Internet-based satirical news site advises readers to ignore comments section A satirical news website has today said that comments offering riches beyond the dreams of avarice which follow some of its stories are utter nonsense and best completely ignored. Geoffrey Pollock,... |
0 | |
Chipchase | 04.08.20 10:10am Chipchase |
| Man dies after falling from holiday balcony - probably next week Friends and family of Mick Tyler (24) were left devasted by the news that he fell to his death - sometime in the foreseeale future, ninety minutes after Happy Hour started. Given the inevitable... |
1 | |
Wrenfoe | 04.08.20 9:42am sydalg |
| Sewage testing for Covid-19 begins in England starting with Brexit Party HQ | 0 | |
oshaughnessy | 04.08.20 9:24am oshaughnessy |
| Covid-19: WHO warns of no silver bullet amid vaccine search..Bob Seger disagrees | 1 | |
ron cawleyoni | 04.08.20 9:19am granger |
| EPL latest : Directors meet to determine number of penalties awarded to Man Utd EPL Directors are meeting up early next week to discuss how many penalties Man Utd will be awarded during the 2020-2021 season., Although Utd were awarded 13 of the 79 penalties during this... |
0 | |
Gerontius | 04.08.20 8:34am Gerontius |
| Government's latest game-changer replaces chess with Scrabble. | 0 | |
Mick Turate | 04.08.20 8:03am Mick Turate |
| UK to eat it self out of recession. | 0 | |
ron cawleyoni | 04.08.20 7:59am ron cawleyoni |
| No Corvid testing in schools Ofsted to estimate the results | 0 | |
Ian Searle | 04.08.20 7:33am Ian Searle |
| What I meant was 'Deborah Meaden is a National Treasure HUNT' | 0 | |
beckfordburger | 04.08.20 7:28am beckfordburger |
| Fox for Johnson, Werritty for Cummings - O what might have been... More optative news later... |
0 | |
Mirthless Evil C | 04.08.20 4:23am Mirthless Evil C |
| Tories state Ministerial Code: deny, duck and cover up Turtle idiots... |
0 | |
Mirthless Evil C | 03.08.20 8:13pm Mirthless Evil C |
| Not removing whip sensibly saves paperwork next time there’s a close vote | 1 | |
Filthy Rich | 03.08.20 8:09pm SteveB |
| Manchester declares major incident after three days without rain | 2 | |
Max Stars | 03.08.20 8:08pm SteveB |
| Academics still perplexed by why Enya was singing about Womble piss | 0 | |
SteveB | 03.08.20 8:05pm SteveB |
| "No covid silver bullet yet," says WHO. "Wear a string of garlic, meantime." | 0 | |
Dumbing Down | 03.08.20 7:57pm Dumbing Down |
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