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Welcome to the NewsBiscuit Writers' Room 0 Nice Admin Lady 02.12.13 11:19pm
Nice Admin Lady
After disappointing initial sales Müller withdraws ‘Offal Corner’ yoghurts 0
DavidH 23.10.17 11:15pm
DavidH
Man who likes sex every twelve hours fancies Tess Daly and Keira Knightley 4
Smart Alex 23.10.17 11:14pm
DavidH
'Cowardly' Nigel Farage dumped me by semaphore claims mistress

A former lover of the right-wing political figure, Nigel Farage, has branded the former UKIP leader 'cowardly' after he allegedly ended their 6 months relationship using semaphore signals sent from a...

7
Jonny Shlep 23.10.17 5:36pm
Jonny Shlep
Fan accused of groping Harry Styles, felt a bit of a dick. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 23.10.17 5:27pm
dominic_mcg
Runners take wrong turn during Venice Marathon. Dozens feared drowned. More soon 5
dominic_mcg 23.10.17 4:40pm
Titus
Guilt-Ridden Man Tearfully Confesses He Once Asked A Woman For A Shag

'Luckily, she turned me down, saying "Not right now - maybe back at my place later?" confided sales assistant Nigel Postlethwaite on national radio. 'Otherwide, I might have ended up having sexual...

7
Titus 23.10.17 4:34pm
Sinnick
MugabeWHO appointment 'miracle' which qualifies him for sainthood say Catholics 1
Adrian Bamforth 23.10.17 4:07pm
Titus
Viewers complain as historical TV drama too accurate. More soon. 2
dominic_mcg 23.10.17 4:04pm
dominic_mcg
Couple on Escape to the Country set new 'eye-watering' budget record

Barrington and Clarissa Bush-Millington, a couple from The Cotswolds, have gone into the record books following their episode of Escape to the Country was broadcast during which they set a staggering...

1
Chipchase 23.10.17 3:49pm
Titus
Remaining, Desolate Countries Of The EU Invited To Join The British Commonwealth

'We need to make it clear, we have no animosity towards the rump of the former European Union' said a pro-Brexit member of the cabinet today 'And we have no wish to see these stricken countries...

1
Titus 23.10.17 3:37pm
Titus
Emperor dances all night in new clothes to John Cage's 4'33" 2
sydalg 23.10.17 1:15pm
*****
Medical records to be released on coloured vinyl and picture disc 1
DavidH 23.10.17 1:14pm
*****
Hipster Prosecuted For Spilling Man's Pint in Dubai, Or Something Like That 0
Titus 23.10.17 12:32pm
Titus
Film director Alan Smithee accused of sexual harassment. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 23.10.17 12:27pm
dominic_mcg
Daleks in new fear of man who’s good at Norman Wisdom impressions 0
Midfield Diamond 23.10.17 11:29am
Midfield Diamond
Criminal underworld rejoices as Toxic Avenger hit by T Charge. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 23.10.17 11:27am
dominic_mcg
White supremacist police force chief admits - "It's a fair cop"

evenin' all soon...

0
NotNowCato 23.10.17 11:17am
NotNowCato
ISIS claims responsibility for Insectifida - but new BBC cop drama blames Brexit

Detective Jack Implausible, of the Special Heavy Handed Symbolism Squad, has got enough on his plate already. He's been handed a value signalling home life, he's up to his neck in allegories and...

1
ronseal 23.10.17 11:14am
Benvoleo
Bowling alley siege over after gunman is permitted to wear his own shoes. 3
dominic_mcg 23.10.17 11:09am
Midfield Diamond
BBC announces new documentary about parasites: Life on Attenborough. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 23.10.17 9:48am
dominic_mcg
BBC reveals the Doctor's new companions. NHS to follow suit. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 23.10.17 9:45am
dominic_mcg
People fed up with classic comedy reruns call for more Goon control 0
sydalg 23.10.17 9:18am
sydalg
Senate canteen switches to plastic cutlery in wake of Caesar tragedy 0
sydalg 23.10.17 9:15am
sydalg
95% of gambling adverts interrupted by sport

The Remote Gambling Association (RGA) has raised concerns that infomercials on betting are being used to promote football, Ray Winstone and other unsavoury addictions. The fear is that supporting...

0
Wrenfoe 23.10.17 7:48am
Wrenfoe
Prince George is 'making her have to go to rehab' says teacher's friend

Like many of her professional colleagues up and down the land, it seems this half term can't come quickly enough for primary school teacher, Anne McKee. That's because she's got the future king,...

1
Chipchase 23.10.17 7:12am
Titus
Spain Plans Armada To Bring Catalonia Back Under Its Control

Better luck this time ...

0
Titus 23.10.17 7:10am
Titus
Gunman holding hostages ’not terror-related’

More institutional Islamophobia soon ...

9
Warwickshire Police 23.10.17 6:52am
Titus
Drug dealers complain of Political correctness gone mad as Scotland bans smack 1
ronseal 23.10.17 1:59am
umfuli
UN rapporteur to France's #MeToo: #balancetonporc, rumoured to be an Ex UK PM 1
Benvoleo 23.10.17 1:39am
umfuli
Health Lottery to dispense medicinal prizes to lucky NHS ‘winners‘ 0
DavidH 22.10.17 10:52pm
DavidH