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Podcaster works from his bathroom



A popular podcaster, who set up a studio in his bathroom, was apparently unaware his popularity may be down to the fact his partner is often showering behind him.


Newsbiscuit contacted the man, who asked us not to mention his name for tax purposes, if he was aware his audience were more interested in his partner’s naked body than his right-wing rants and swastika patterned shower curtain; and in any event it was difficult to hear what he had to say with the noise the shower makes, along with the occasional flushing of the lavatory, but he pointed out it was the only place in his flat he had sufficient space for a studio.


He did, however, thank us for our interest in Reform UK and hopes our article will encourage more people to vote for his party.


Photo by Jukka Aalho on Unsplash

Five Go Dobbing in the Neighbours


Uncle Quentin was seen in Smuggler’s Cove, without a mask,’ exclaimed Julian.


‘What a frightful bore,’ said George. ‘Doesn’t he know that Timmy has an undying medical condition? He keeps eating poisoned food’.


They said it couldn’t be done. A new NewsBiscuit annual. Or maybe it was ‘shouldn’t’. That’s right, it shouldn’t be done. In fact, there was a petition. Maybe a march or two? Now that I think about it, there was a Court Order. People chaining themselves to railings. The threat of a military coup.


But we said to hell with them. We were going to publish. Regardless of the suffering and derisory sales. If we could get Brexit done, how hard would it be to write a NewsBiscuit book?


BTW how’s the Brexit thing going?


From the same team that brought you 'Fifteen Years of Typos' comes an extensive anthology of twelve months of fake news from the UKs original fake news site, Newsbiscuit. Over 800 carefully curated comedy fake news articles and more than 700 one-line news gags all together in one volume written by some of the funniest and most creative comedy writers known to work for free.


Articles drawn from September 2020 until August 2021, approximately mirroring events in the real world, include:



Bloke in pub to join Cabinet


NATO to tut and shake their heads at Russia


Second wave of press conferences to hit the UK


National Fiasco Memorial built in the wrong place


Coronavirus will be with us for between two years and forever, say scientists


Biden selects Kamala Harris to be his running-mate and carer


Government finally admits it has 'no idea' why we have daylight saving time


and hundreds more


Five Go Dobbing in the Neighbours makes a great gift for friends and to yourself





The Real Man’s Top 10 tips for using the bathroom




Do you want to show the woman in your life what a fantastic specimen of manhood you are? It’s not just about how you behave in the bedroom! Show the lady how lucky she is to be shacked up with you by following this guide to using the bathroom:


1. When cleaning your teeth, admire your reflection as you flick toothpaste all over the bathroom mirror.

2. When shaving, always leave the sink covered in stubble, like some poor imitation of the Shroud of Turin.


3. When showering, leave the shower curtain open, so the bathroom floor gets covered by 2 inches of water.


4. Ensure the plug hole is left blocked with arse hair.

5. When using the toilet, leave the door open. Women find the sound of a man grunting one out or pissing like a racehorse a big turn on.


6. Animals in the wild mark their territory with urine - do the same in your bathroom by spraying piss all around the rim of the toilet, and the surrounding floor. Don’t flush when you’ve finished, and leave the seat up.


 7. Alternatively, don’t bother lifting the seat in the first place - just piss all over it, and sprinkle with pubes.


8. When taking a dump, a real man leaves skid marks all down the back of the toilet bowl. Only a wimp would think of using a toilet brush afterwards, other than as an implement to break up a mega-turd that won’t flush. Oh, and It’s a sign of masculinity to leave the bathroom as stinky as possible, so don’t open a window when you’ve finished.


9. Never replace an empty toilet roll - you are a man and have more important things to do, like belching the theme tune to Match of the Day, or setting light to your farts.


10. Communication is vital in a relationship, so don’t forget to describe your bowel movements to her afterwards. She’ll really appreciate you telling her last night’s curry has given you ring sting.


First published 23 March 2022




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