First Race of the 2024 Sewage Works Rally Season Gets Underway.

Winner: Sirlupus

Runners-Up:

"Vauxhall controversial driverless car does need pilot" (APepper);

"Smart motorway self-identifies as river" (FlashArry)

The Nylon Tracksuit was Already Chafing, and She'd Only Walked out to the Blocks.

Winner: Flash Arry

Runners-Up:

"Claire was going to win Olympic 100m Gold, whatever the Department of Delusional Disorders due to Traumatic Head Injuries might say." (Benvoleo);

"Race to break New Year's resolutions off to an early start." (APepper)

"Please, Dad, Come Home. Mum Says you can be the Easter Bunny too if That’s What you Really Want."

Winner: Dick Everyman

Runners-Up:

"You want Lego? Even I can't afford Lego these days." (Desk Pilot);

"Sorry but arriving by flying sleigh is even more illegal than a small boat." (NOT Titus).