As the Martian War Machine rose from the cylinder, the people of Uxbridge and South Ruislip rejoiced

WINNER

As the Martian War Machine rose from the cylinder, the people of Uxbridge and South Ruislip rejoiced. (from Camz)

RUNNERS UP

Audience mood about to change as band shouts "Everybody sing!" (apepper)

"All hail the giant Femidom from the sky!" (sinnick)

"Just do the finger thing. We'll get served quicker." (Camz)

'Let's sing the chorus really loud, to piss off everyone who actually likes this band!' said Toby. (Pat Ward)

More pictures emerge of Downing Street lockdown parties. (dick everyman)

Yet again,the Mexican wave had failed to launch : perhaps they should wait until after the eulogy. (FlashArry)

Socialist youth overjoyed as they flock to unburstable red bubble (mcdabble)

Socialist uses yoga to abolish piers of the realm

WINNER

Socialist uses yoga to abolish piers of the realm (from jimskinz)

RUNNERS UP

Gillian Keegan conducting active negotiations with the teachers' unions. (Daniel Temelkov)

Latest Tsunami early warning system called into question. (dickeveryman)

Bridge between Britain and Ireland willed into existence. (SteveB)

Wife who demanded to be placed on pedestal unsure of how to get down (FlashArry)

Samira's guru smiled at her dedication. She'd stayed relaxed as the council had dismantled the pier. (Camz)

'Here's to Dave - in life, a complete shit, in death, a fruity bouillon'

WINNER

"Here's to Dave - in life, a complete shit, in death, a fruity bouillon" (from FlashArry)

RUNNERS UP

When the strikers first started the picket line there was an actual hospital behind them (deskpilot)

Julia quietly wondered why her friend Barbara insisted she drink from the silver flask first and not from her own flask. (Scott Young)

On the same day every year, deep in the woods, a portal opened into the 1970's. Only Beryl and her gran knew of it. Gran had always made shit coffee. (mcdabble)

She hoped her friend would say "when," before the flames reached her jumper. (mrlemoncurry)

"Could we be in the wrong place? Because this counter-offensive is going easier than I thought." (jeremy_howell10)

"Right,that's the degenerate filth purged from the Hundred Acre Wood : tomorrow, Trumpton!" (FlashArry)

The witches of Dorset's youth chapter had a new challenge. No cauldron, no broomstick, and no credit cards.

(camz)

Sally and Jo waited by the fire until nothing was left of the driver who had left them both needing neck braces (sirlupus)

Government unveils its new social housing programme. (Martyn Casserley)

Both realised this idyllic moment would be destroyed once they started to erect the tents (FlashArry)