The Chancellor has announced that a funding boost for British culture, such as provided by the BBC, is to come from a special tax on foreign-owned golf courses.
It is thought this tax will raise at least £1bn.
Photo by Courtney Cook on Unsplash
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In an attempt to staunch the recent and highly embarrassing flow of prisoners being allowed to go free moments after having been sentenced to imprisonment, the Ministry of Justice has issued new tough guidelines.
A department spokesman explained: 'We've come up with a rather clever scheme, actually. As convicted prisoners leave the dock, a security guard will accompany them to a holding area in the court to be known as "the cells".
'There they will await the arrival of transport to bring them to jail. Upon arrival there they will be shown into their new accommodation and the door will then be locked. Why no one's thought of it before is somewhat puzzling. Gosh, what silly old sausages we've been.'
- Throngsman
- Nov 16, 2025
Amazon has complained about a campaign by Reform that threatens all references to Black Friday when they get into power.
'Friday is for everyone, in fact it is more for white people than people of colour,' said a Reform spokesperson today. 'We don't mind blackboards, we're not woke,' he added, and said accident black spots were 'just fine by him' and 'black shirts were really his preference'.
'Honestly, I'm browned off by all this woke stuff. Not literally, obviously,' he said, checking in the mirror. Then in the Sun until finding refuge in the Daily Mail comments section.
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