It was admitted today, even by his most ardent fans, that Wes Anderson has been rereleasing the same movie over and over again for his whole career.
“It started as a genuine mistake with my second movie, Rushmore. Somehow the studio accidentally sent out a print of Bottle Rocket, a movie I’d made a couple of years before. I was bracing myself for complaints, but in fact all the reviews were very positive, commenting on the visual style which they said was fast becoming a Wes Anderson trademark.
“It got me wondering how far I could push this, so a few years later I released it again as The Royal Tenenbaums. Again, raves across the board, especially for my ‘distinctive visual aesthetic’. I mean, didn’t anyone notice the actors and the script were exactly the same?
“What really makes me laugh is when they talk about how more and more famous actors appear in my movies these days, even in tiny roles, which they think shows how everyone wants to work with me. They’re the same damn actors! They just weren’t famous in the 90s when I started out.”
Critic and long time Wes Anderson groupie Mark Kermit wasn’t at all embarrassed by the revelation, saying if anything it made him feel better about having written the same gushing review every time.
image from pixabay
A Hollywood legend has passed. Colleagues waxed lyrical in the blandest of terms. Friends spoke of his untimely death caused by a lifestyle of doing things that will kill you. Followed by gushing tributes from people he owed money to.
Fortunately his obituary provided a translation for those not versed in Hollywood speak, he was described as a loving husband (meaning gay). A devoted father (so a cuckold then). The life and soul (a drunk). An Artist (unprofitable). A Visionary (bat $hit crazy). And uncompromising (definitely racist).
One Director described him as a mercurial talent (which means always late for work). An Action Hero (so he couldn't act). A Heartthrob (he definitely couldn't act). And was a firm Fan's favourite (so, hated by cast and crew).
He was one of the greats - old school (so a nonce, basically).
Image: giaknight - Pixabay