Keir Starmer introduces new Artificial Policies Initiative

In a push towards the overall concept of a bright new future, the Labour Government has proudly announced it has a new set of realistic looking strategies.

AP will allow overwhelmed, struggling government officials to have a complete set of made up, successful plans to present to the public. Possibly using photo realistic rendered images with lots of smiling multi ethnic people.

Rachel Reeves is currently using Quantum Technology to say the economy is improving whilst it also actually decreasing at the same time. Another amazing simulated British technological breakthrough.

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PM to 'unleash AI' as soon as someone explains it to him

An excited Starmer insisted that he had a secret plan to stimulate growth, so secret that the details of it still eluded him. His spokeswoman explained: 'All AI images have six fingers. Thi of it, six fingers! That's a 20% increase in fingers, right there.'

'AI can paraphrase an inaccurate Wikipedia page in seconds, saving you hours of plagiarism and fake claims. All lying will be 100% quicker and than fact checked by AI.

She continued in a celebratory mood : 'This will generate 13,000 new jobs, by helping cut 100,000 old jobs...what? Hold on, that can't be right? 13 minus 100 is...no, no, no....that would be a disaster. Can someone get me a calculator or move a few zeroes around?'

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Labour hope Artificial Intelligence can replace Actual Incompetence

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