Cheese | NewsBiscuit

Somerset cheese factory forced to stop production

Gerontius
1 day ago

The Cheddar Cheese Company in Somerset has been forced to stop producing one of its leading brands of cheese because it has become too crumbly. Cheese experts say the cheese has become so crumbly since its introduction that it is now deemed unsafe to eat.

One pub in the Midlands that served crumbly cheddar in its sandwiches subsequently collapsed entirely, although in a stroke of good fortune for its new owners, the government is reported to be in talks with them to 'deal' with crooked school buildings in a similar fashion.

Production of the crumbly cheese started in Somerset during the 1950s and proved so popular with consumers that other cheese producers started to make it too. Due to its lighter weight, reduced cost and resistance to heat the cheese has been widely used on sandwiches, as a filler in jacket potatoes, as a covering for fish pie and in more recent years has become popular as a topping for pizza.

There are growing concerns that cheese shortages caused by the crumbliness could hit the ploughman’s lunch trade and have knock on effects for the pub and catering industry. Dairy product inspectors discovered problems with the life span of the cheese in the mid 1990s and recommendations were put in place to make the cheese less crumbly.

It's understood The National Union of Ploughmen are watching the situation with concern. General Secretary, David Furrow, said: 'They say there's no such thing as a free lunch, but worryingly, there may not be any lunch for us if this crisis deepens. It's a proper pickle and no mistake.'

But successive management at the factory ignored the warnings and continued to produce the crumbly cheese.

Part of the production line has been forced to close down and relocate to a portacabin on the factory car park.

The crumbly cheese problem does not only affect production in Somerset but is widespread across the UK. A full list of cheese producers affected by the crumbliness can be found on the Defra website and FarmingUK have set up a helpline for anybody affected by the crumbliness of their cheese.

hat tips: sirlupus; Chipchase

Photo by Pixzolo Photography on Unsplash

www.newsbiscuit.com

First published 8 Sep 2023

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A pack of four hot cross buns on a supermarket shelf were surprised to find themselves being cheese and onion flavour this week. They made this discovery when a shopper picked them up and read out their description to her companion then made a face of mild disgust and put them straight back. The companion shook his head and said ‘What will they think of next? It’s a gimmick aimed at people with no proper respect for the great bun traditions of their youth.’

One of the four buns said they thought they’d smelt something oniony within their cellophane home but decided they must have mis-smelt. Another of the buns said disgust is one of the seven basic emotions visible on a human’s face and all buns leave the oven hoping to cause a face of enjoyment. The third bun to speak said you can’t trust humans because they call an onion which is clearly purple a red onion. The final bun to express an opinion was more optimistic and reminded fellow buns that cheese and Christmas cake pair well together so maybe they would catch on. The buns then watched as their bakery mates the extra fruity buns and the apple and cinnamon buns were chosen while they remained firmly shelf-bound. They had a brief cheerful moment when one of them remembered the Vic Reeves joke about onions.