Speaking to a room of seats at the Conservative Party Conference, the shadow chancellor announced a merger of classic policies to create a new incentive; young people can buy a house by renting for a period, then having this count towards a discount on the property in the suburbs of Kigali.
'This generation dream of home ownership, but find all the properties in their budget have already been bought by landlords paying cash,' said the chancellor. 'Obviously, we don't want to upset those landlords as they're likely party members, and we gave so much money to the Rwandan government when we were in power that we figured this was a good way to maximise the return on the investment.'
Speaking to the press after the announcement, a party official elaborated on the idea, telling us, 'The young will love Kigali: the weather is good, the internet is fast, and the whole country has been genocide-free for at least five years. And if they get tired of life in paradise, then they can trek across the Sahara and Mediterranean, traverse their way across Europe, and pay a people trafficker to bring them back to the UK on a small boat.'
