Ayrton Senna documentary criticized for not being new

Ayrton Senna documentary, Senna: No Fear, No Limits, No equal is drawing the ire of viewers for not having been just released. The once lauded film documenting the life of the tragic Formula One racing driver, is, critics point out, now 13 years old. The documentary production team is scrambling to launch a defence of their work since it does in fact appear that the film isn’t new.

In 2012, Senna: No Fear, No Limits, No Equal, was chronologically new. At its launch, one of film maker Asif Kapadia’s people repeatedly referenced the newness of the work when questioned about its originality. ‘This is a new documentary. It is new. And so, we hope, in having made it very recently, that it will remain new. New Senna. New documentary. New newness.’ But now that his film has aged, Kapadia’s team is backtracking. ‘Look, we never ever maintained that Senna: No Fear, No Limits, No Equal was in its essence new. It wasn’t about newness. Or required newness qua newness.’

But critics point out that Kapadia’s new documentary, Senna: Newness qua Newness, again plays on the theme of newness as a strategic selling point. ‘I,’ said one. ‘I,’ he repeated, warming to his theme, ‘I think that Kapadia is a busted flush. The problem with his new work is there’s nothing new about it.’ Essentially new or in its essence new? ‘Old.’

Fans of the Brazilian motoring ace have called for a boycott of Kapadia’s works, including all future new ones. ‘For this guy to ever produce anything truly new, he’s going to have to be the newness he wants to see.’ Meaning? ‘Meaning he knew we knew the new doc wasn’t new new, just a new old version he knew not to be new.’

* Senna: No Fear, No Limits, No equal is out 13 years ago.

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Attenborough to voice Tory MP wildlife documentary

As Tory MPs become an endangered species - possibly facing extinction - David Attenborough will lend his trademark breathy vocals to a 3 part mini-series all about them.

'Here, deep in the heart of a generic Home County, we see the Tory MP in his natural habitat: cricket, a village fete, a long suffering wife. But what's this... a non-white person is walking nearby and we see the Tory MP begin to strut. Let's listen in: "Political correctness has gone mad, woke, flights to Rwanda, British values". It's aggressive, yet pointless, it's all just a performance, as if he's wearing some GBShoes.'

Later in the show, the Tory MP was shown hard at work in Westminster.

'Back in the Westminster office, an unlucky female Parliamentary aide has caught the Tory MPs eye. We hear the guttural mating noises: "Mmm I say, yes please matron, what a fine filly". Inexplicably, he's in luck. She responds positively. Despite the long suffering wife at home, the Tory MP begins rutting the aide and with a cry of "Margaret Thatcher", it's all over very quickly and he's off for a GBSnooze. That's a shame. She will need a few G&Ts to suppress that memory.'

Attenborough's closing narration did end on a jollier note however.

'By January 2025, Tory MPs will be extinct in the wild, with just a few of these extraordinary animals kept in cages on GBZoos, awaiting the sweet release of either an autobiography or death. It's up to us to do the right thing.'

Sexual assault allegations are very on Brand

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