Conservatives to offer internships as Prime Minister

'We got the idea from "Have I Got News For You?" ' said a spokesman. 'When Angus Deayton had to leave because of the, erm, cocaine allegations, they brought in guest presenters. We’ve been doing the same with our Prime Ministers.'

The Conservative Party’s plan is to allow the children of wealthy donors to each do a week as "Intern PM" .

'Oh, they’d run the country, much as Liz is doing now,' said the spokesman. 'It will look good on their CVs and the chances are the pound might rally a bit.'

Keir Starmer described the idea as ‘interesting’ and asked if there would be an age limit.

www.newsbiscuit.com

First published 9 Oct 2022

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Man prompts outrage with terrifying '40-something-burnout' Halloween outfit

Norfolk man Rod Flannigan plans to 'dust off' his only pair of jeans combined with a threadbare Ghostbusters T-shirt, an ensemble he wears on any given day - with local parents concerned that it is too frightening for young Trick or Treaters.

'I'm all for a bit of spooky fun, but this is horrific' said neighbour and mum of three, Karen. 'Our five year old Jake isn't afraid of Freddy Krueger answering the door, but having to endure the sight what decades of mundane work, chicken nuggets and cripplingly low aspiration could do to him is just sick. Flannigan should have the decency to hide behind a mask, like the bloody rest of us.'

Rod remains defiant. 'No one is scared of ghouls and ghosts these days' said the 45 year old. 'What's really frightening is the state of the NHS, my cat's food bill and the last three Star Wars films.'

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