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Experts are warning Britons about a sophisticated new scam.


The scam is devastating because the financial consequences are severe for everyone, but the full impact doesn’t become clear until it’s far too late.


‘We’re called it super-bait’n’switch,’ said an infeasibly young so-called scamspert.  ‘We want to tell everyone about it so that they can recognise the signs and avoid getting ripped off.


‘Here’s how the scam works.  Leader A gets elected on an agreed manifesto, that has been debated and agreed beforehand.  As soon as Leader A is in office, there are calls for his or her resignation. Leader A is then switched for Leader B, who says that all of Leader A’s decisions were rubbish and will need to be reversed.  In addition, Leader B promotes new policies, not in the manifesto, claiming that they are the ‘only way to save the country’.  Needless to say, the upheaval and the changes cost the country a fortune, and citizens foot the bill – either through higher taxes, reduced services or both.  This is a particularly cruel scam that impacts hardest on the poorest and most vulnerable.


‘Unfortunately, we are seeing more and more examples of this scam. There are often foreign actors involved – sometimes Russian, sometimes American, sometimes European.  Their influence is powerful, but hard to prove.  Recent examples of the scam include Boris Johnson, Theresa May, Rishi Sunak and Keir Starmer.


‘Our main concern now is that bad actors may successfully combine this new scam with more traditional ones, such as romance scams. That would be terrifying.’




As Keir Starmer prepares to resign, the nation eagerly awaits the next numbskull to be outsmarted by a stapler. Said one voter, ‘It’s like waiting for Christmas, where all your parcels conceal a shiny turd. Will be it be Wes Streeting, will it be Andy Burnham, who knows, who cares, whoever it is will be will treat the welfare of the nation like optional side quests.’


The new PM will need to harness Starmer’s electrifying energy of a man trying to push a pull door for three full minutes. ‘We needed bold ideas, so no doubt we’ll get someone who is confused by their own reflection, thinks salad goes in the microwave and acts like Benjamin Netanyahu is a kindly old man.


‘The UK expects the new incumbent to have the strategic foresight of a dropped croissant. The reliability, of someone who loses their keys while holding them. And the calm authority of a man discovering a wasp in his shoe. So, basically, another Keir Starmer.



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