UK ready for next Village Idiot
- Wrenfoe
- 1 hour ago
- 1 min read
As Keir Starmer prepares to resign, the nation eagerly awaits the next numbskull to be outsmarted by a stapler. Said one voter, ‘It’s like waiting for Christmas, where all your parcels conceal a shiny turd. Will be it be Wes Streeting, will it be Andy Burnham, who knows, who cares, whoever it is will be will treat the welfare of the nation like optional side quests.’
The new PM will need to harness Starmer’s electrifying energy of a man trying to push a pull door for three full minutes. ‘We needed bold ideas, so no doubt we’ll get someone who is confused by their own reflection, thinks salad goes in the microwave and acts like Benjamin Netanyahu is a kindly old man.
‘The UK expects the new incumbent to have the strategic foresight of a dropped croissant. The reliability, of someone who loses their keys while holding them. And the calm authority of a man discovering a wasp in his shoe. So, basically, another Keir Starmer.
Image: saniusman89 - Pixabay
