Tufty Club offers safety tips for ships crossing the Strait of Hormuz

The International Maritime Organisation is bringing back Tufty the Squirrel to offer advice to ships' captains as they try and make it through the perilous Strait of Hormuz.

"Look right, look left, then look right ahead," says the iconic cartoon character - the star of British TV road safety films in the 1960s and 1970s - in a series of recent Instagram posts.

"Listen out for the sound of missiles or drones," continues the perky Tufty, "and always tell a grown-up where you're going.

"But not if that grown-up is Donald Trump, because his navy will just hit your vessel with missiles and board it. Or the Islamic Revolution Guard Corps, because they'll set you on fire and sink you.

"On second thoughts," says Tufty, his bushy tail noticeably sagging, "you'd be better off just closing your eyes and making a mad dash to the other side, hoping to hell no one gets you."

Tufty is 65 years-old in going nuts years.

Mr Benn and gone

With the recent and sad passing of Mr Benn, of Festive Avenue, London, funeral arrangements have needed to be made.

Mr William Benn leaves his dog, Eddie and gorilla, Gus behind.

Mr Benn's closest and dearest friend 'the Shopkeeper' has kindly agreed to provide a suitable outfit for his best, and possibly only customer.

The deceased's usual outfit of suit and bowler hat whilst suitable for the occasion belies his memory. Clown, Wizard, spaceman, zookeeper, cowboy, knight and balloonist were all tried but eventually the shopkeeper decided to dress him like Fred from the home pride adverts.

In his final outfit he leaves us through a magic door at the back of the world for his final adventure.

Kid who swallowed magnets left in A&E on the fridge door

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