Con artist to exhibit major series of collages

A new attraction, due to open at the Tate Modern in August, features the work of artist, Dick Scratcher, who specialises in collages of newspaper headlines and speeches from disreputable politicians. Mr Scratcher describes himself as a con artist, since he works through the medium of con tricks played on the public by politicians.

Among the works on display, will be 'Big Society', a montage of the Cameron years when the public was told the nation is all in the shit together, without explaining how the privileged would prosper beyond their wildest dreams; 'Brexitmania', a retrospective of the myriad promises that leaving the EU would definitely bring; and 'Never Give a Sucker an Even Break', a work showing the history of how NHS PPE supplies were deliberately run down, so a cabal of criminals could scam the nation out of billions of pounds with unusable protective equipment.

The Tate Modern is offering the public the chance to suggest a creative name for the exhibition, with entries closing on June 30, and says it is hoping for more inventive suggestions than 'Tory Scum', which is the best the curators could come up with themselves. A full list of exhibits, with a description of what they represent, will be published in due course.

Picture credit: deep dream generator

Civil Service reels as higher level apprenticeships are scrapped

The Civil Service is horrified that the government has scrapped funding for higher level apprenticeships and for older apprentices.

A spokesman said, ‘The Civil Service has an excellent record of delivering apprenticeship places. Everyone in HR is doing an apprenticeship. The government is funding their MA courses and their PhD’s that are essential in getting them well paid jobs in the private sector.   Without the apprenticeship scheme, all these stupid old duffers won’t get any qualifications, and they will just hang around and block promotion for younger staff.

‘All professional functions will be affected – procurement, facilities management, organisational development, finance, talent management, equality and disability officers, LGBTQ+ champions, records management, and communications experts – all the critical back office functions that keep the Civil Service show on the road. This is a tremendous blow.  Without the apprenticeships to keep them busy, these people will be back in the office thinking up new and stupider ways to bugger up the Civil Service.

‘Thankfully, policy work is not affected.  All our policy staff are essentially untrained, including those with degrees in PPE from Oxford University.   They have always argued that their lived experience from the University of Hardly Any Knocks is the best training for thinking up dim-witted policies for their ministers. 

'So, going forward in the new world without funding for apprentices, policymaking will continue to be done by shadowy think tanks, and the civil servants will continue to present this work as their own.’

Picture credit: Wix AI

Hancock: NHS was 45 minutes from running out of PPE

.