Join the noble Lord Peter in his Prince of Darkness theme park in Islington, as he takes his country and party on a steep slide into the mud.
Scream with disgust as you see him ride the vomit-inducing Gravy Train, the Kickback, the Double Cross, the Turncoat and the Sleazy Rider.
Exit through the grift shop.
image from pixabay
"We issued express orders to staff at Royal Lodge to turf out this inmate and deport him to secure accommodation in our category C Sandringham establishment," said a spokes-sceptre for Buckingham Palace.
"Unfortunately he has now gone missing, wearing only his old Garter Order robes and carrying a collection of jazz mags in a clear plastic bag.
"Apparently, the poor guy spent a long time outside the gates of Royal Lodge with a vacant look on his face, trying to get back in," continued the spokes-orb. "We had to wave him away four or five times, explaining that he'd been evicted.
"I don't think he understands stuff that well."
Eye witnesses in Windsor say they had encountered a grey-haired man in the streets asking directions to the railway station while telling passers-by: "I used to be a prince, you know".
"We are working on the assumption that he made his way to Pizza Express in Woking," said a bloodhound from Thames Valley Police.
"That's his happy place."
