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Uncle Quentin was seen in Smuggler’s Cove, without a mask,’ exclaimed Julian.


‘What a frightful bore,’ said George. ‘Doesn’t he know that Timmy has an undying medical condition? He keeps eating poisoned food’.


They said it couldn’t be done. A new NewsBiscuit annual. Or maybe it was ‘shouldn’t’. That’s right, it shouldn’t be done. In fact, there was a petition. Maybe a march or two? Now that I think about it, there was a Court Order. People chaining themselves to railings. The threat of a military coup.


But we said to hell with them. We were going to publish. Regardless of the suffering and derisory sales. If we could get Brexit done, how hard would it be to write a NewsBiscuit book?


BTW how’s the Brexit thing going?


From the same team that brought you 'Fifteen Years of Typos' comes an extensive anthology of twelve months of fake news from the UKs original fake news site, Newsbiscuit. Over 800 carefully curated comedy fake news articles and more than 700 one-line news gags all together in one volume written by some of the funniest and most creative comedy writers known to work for free.


Articles drawn from September 2020 until August 2021, approximately mirroring events in the real world, include:



Bloke in pub to join Cabinet


NATO to tut and shake their heads at Russia


Second wave of press conferences to hit the UK


National Fiasco Memorial built in the wrong place


Coronavirus will be with us for between two years and forever, say scientists


Biden selects Kamala Harris to be his running-mate and carer


Government finally admits it has 'no idea' why we have daylight saving time


and hundreds more


Five Go Dobbing in the Neighbours makes a great gift for friends and to yourself






Bradford knows he’s the lead in a third rate parody. However, his ambition is to be the lead in a Dan Brown story, but doesn’t know if he has to dumb up or down for the gig.


In ‘The Last Simple’, Bradford, a professor of Simpology from Harvard, follows clues left by the illiterati, ignoranti and even the bingoranti as he tries to track down the kidnapper of Lord Bartholomew. Aided by Lord Bartholomew’s daughter, Lady Bartholomew, and her loathsome manservant Belsen, Bradford has to evade arrest by not one, but two Buffoons of a Copper while bouncing around the renowned cultural centres of Northern England, from Lincoln Cathedral to Blackpool Tower.


Aided by Surly Teabing, the rudest man in England, while dodging Teabing’s servant Snivell, Bradford finds himself in a race against time, logic, bad jokes, ridiculous puns and awful gags as he searches for the Last Simple in an improbable if unbelievable storyline.


This a laugh a minute book, assuming you’re a very fast reader.


Includes the Christmas Special and at least one deleted chapter.





Ray Sullivan is a writer and editor for Newsbiscuit. He has ten novels published ranging in genres from comedy, science fiction and thrillers.





NewsBiscuit – the media outlet that brought such scoops as ‘Queen punches Emma Watson’, ‘Dog wins custody of Johnny Depp’ & ‘Piers Morgan beheaded by CNN’.


NewsBiscuit – who warned ‘Hobbits to be culled’, ‘Ducks to become our new Overlords’ and ‘Public told not to download naked photos of Steven Seagal’.


NewsBiscuit - raising delicate issues of faith, such as 'Child finds Jesus in her Kinder Surpriseâ„¢', 'Jedis still outnumber Nuns' and 'Pope fails to give birth'.


NewsBiscuit – the first to reveal ‘Last man to fake Moon walk dies’, ‘Chocolate bars aren’t smaller, we’re just fatter’ and the prophetic 'Sex originated in Scotland and will probably end there'.


NewsBiscuit. Not a biscuit. Definitely not news.


Another backdated compilation of NewsBiscuit from befgore the start of time - or shortly after



REVIEWS


W. Shakespeare: ‘If only I’d thought of it first.’


Johannes Gutenberg: ‘It’s what the printing press was invented for.’


Amazon Reviewer: ‘What do you mean I can’t get a refund?’


Lego to Replace Bitcoin makes a great gift for your friends and for yourself





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