- Ian Searle
- Dec 19, 2025
Santa is tightening his belt after checking his pay slip, twice, and finding his salary has not risen. His per hour rate is the same as last Christmas, a mince pie and a glass of whisky.
Elves, on the other hand, but have seen a slight bump in average pay compared to last year with twice much being provided in the four main food groups, candy, candy canes, candy corn, and syrup .
A spokesdeer for the Union of Santa's Distributor and Reindeer (USDAR), Red Rudolf, admitted piles oats are spread in the gardens to attract and reward them, but these has been (literally) frozen for years.
He added, "We are expected to fly o'er the housetops with a, very difficult to manoeuvre, sleigh full of toys. I myself have the added responsibility of guiding the team, even on a foggy Christmas Eve. As the leader of the team, and elected representative of the transport workers, Santa's response is to just whistle and shout at me. All the other reindeer laugh and call me names. I am asking for a little more recognition and commensurate compensation for our hard work, a little less stick, and a bit more carrot!"
image from pixabay
