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Benjamin Netanyahu’s tweets to be read by WWE wrestler


Proving that history will eat itself and that irony is just a metal, but with more iron, Israel’s PM has gone ‘full Thanos’.  From this day forward, Mr. Netanyahu agreed that his speeches will be more accurately contextualized if shouted by spray-tanned steroid-abuser, lathered up with baby oil, while wearing nothing but a spandex thong.


Taking Godwin’s Law to be more of a guideline, Mr. Netanyahu explained that: ‘The weak crumble, are slaughtered and are erased from history’.  Which is no way plagiarizes a cheeky little speech from Munich 1933 ('Providence shows no mercy to weak nations…’) but does use the same chord structure as Robin Thicke’s ‘Blurred Lines’


Many peace-loving Israeli’s are somewhat concerned that Mr. Netanyahu may have anger management issues. A spokesman for Mr. Netanyahu explained: ‘We will crush our enemies.  See them driven before us and hear the lamentations of their women.  And if it’s good enough for Conan the Barbarian, it’s good enough for Bibi.’


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