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Boris resignation speech "eerily familiar" say ex-wives & mistresses

The surprisingly large WhatsApp group "AllMenAreBastardsButEspeciallyBoris" where ex-wives and mistresses meet to act for mutual support has been analysing Mr Johnson's resignation speech and there has been an agreement that several phrases are very familiar.

"The 'eccentric decision' bit - I've heard that before.", said Allegra Mostyn-Owen, or Mrs Johnson number 1.

"And 'we, that is to say, I, achieved great things'- he shouted that through the letter box when he found his clothes in the driveway." added Marina Wheeler (number 2).

"And him agreeing to leave then hanging round the house where he wasn't wanted, he did that to me." said Petronella Wyatt (never actually married).

The group has a waiting list.

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