An executive explained: 'Your average OAP from the Windsor area, wants something a little more elaborate - a gold encrusted carriage, a 21 gun salute and a nice finger buffet, with plenty of cheese balls. That costs a tad more than our usual package, which involves a CO-OP carrier bag and a trip to the nearest landfill.'
One Monarch spoke of the peace of mind it gave them: 'For £10 a month I get to close down the entire nation. More importantly it means I don't have to dip into my own savings, as I'm down to my last thirty billion pounds.'
Plans are already in place for Prince Andrew's funeral. Said one citizen: 'We all chipped in and quite frankly, it can't come soon enough.'
image from pixabay