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Covid welcomes relaxation of restrictions on Covid

In a prepared statement, coronavirus has spoke of his relief to be getting out and about after the restrictions on movement were lifted: ‘It's been a long tough summer. And I haven't been able to attend as many festivals as I hoped. Vaccines? Well, I'd be lying if I said they made me feel a bit unwelcome. But clearly the relaxed protections mean you missed me all along.'

‘I'm pleased they’ve removed Covid precautions at schools. It’s just great to see all those smiling - maskless – faces. Next, let's get rid of all that boring hand-washing, okay? I'm particularly grateful to all those businesses that insisted their staff should be onsite – you’ve definitely got your priorities right. I'm just happy to be visiting relatives ... your relatives, their relatives, anyone’s relatives really. I'm just a people person.'

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