As part of a successful Independence vote, thousands of Scottish citizens will be released back into the wild. Said one captive: ‘Many of us had been lured south of the border, by the promise of cheap larger and non-ginger brides. Instead, we’ve had to endure years of fundamentalist Morris Dancing’. In exchange, the English have demanded the intellectual rights to the song 'Mull of Kintyre' and sole use of the word 'minging'.
