top of page

Eradicate the main cause of childhood illiteracy – eradicate children ‏




An education spokesperson said: ‘We’re not going to euthanasia the grammatically challenged kiddie-winks, that would be cruel and time consuming. We are just going to reclassify them as stupid adults.


‘No more small people saying ‘I’m bored’, ‘it’s not fair’ or monopolizing all the jelly. Re-branding illiterate children as simply ‘diminutive idiots’, is an important step in tackling under-achievement in schools; with the next logical step – close all the schools


‘We’re going to break the literacy ceiling. Which means we’ll probably need the ceiling lowered. Or longer arms. We’re not just moving the goal posts. We’re sh$tting in the away team’s dressing room. Childhood literacy will be a thing of the past…as soon as we redefine what history is’.


IMAGE: https://pixabay.com/photos/boys-kids-children-happy-sitting-286245/


52 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Despite live-tweeting the killing of Osama, it turns out the CIA spent much of the 80s sending Afghan warlords $630 million in annual payments, in exchange for explicit images of Bin Laden provocative

Using its billionaire dollar empire, Facebook intends to purchase creative ownership of large portions of the English language and a significant portion of the air you breathe. A Facebook executive e

Disguised under the pretext of a kit launch, Britain’s athletes took time out of their busy schedule - of avoiding drug tests - to show off more bulging pectorals than a Zac Efron calendar. Oiled lik

bottom of page