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Historical abuse to replace Tudors & Stuarts

The GCSE curriculum is to be revised once more, with a focus on 1970’s light entertainers. Gone are irrelevant studies into obscure renaissance monarchs, replaced by exam questions such as ‘Did the Spanish Armada fail their DBS check?’

Henry VIII will seem positively wholesome compared to the perverts of the contemporary period. The Elizabethan ‘Age of Enlightenment’ will now be replaced with an Elizabethan ‘Age of Consent Form’ and Samuel Pepys will be swapped for peeping toms. Excitingly school children throughout the land will now be involved in all manner of historical re-enactment…when they are not too busy giving witness testimony.

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