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Jabba the Hutt to sue Keir Starmer

The agent representing Jabba the Hutt has applied to the courts to put a cease and desist order on Sir Keir Starmer, who compared the criminal, slug-like persona known as the Prime Minister to the fictional character in Star Wars. 'Being cast as a bad guy in probably the largest franchise on the planet is generally good for my profile, but to be compared to Boris Johnson is an insult to my craft,' the character proclaimed today.

Star Wars fans also complained about the comparison. 'If Johnson is Jabba, then surely Jabba is also Luke Skywalker's father?' said one fan, explaining that once you let Johnson into the story arc anyone else claiming to be someone's father is unlikely to be believed. 'At that point the internal logic falls apart, it does,' pointed out another fictional character that might have been Yoda, but was probably Michael Gove.

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