'I am one of Athens' most important mathematicians,' Archimedes declared stoutly to reporters at a press conference in the agora.
'That is why I find it so demeaning when all these urchins from the gymnasium crowd round me, when I am sitting in the sand drawing circles, and chant: "Who ate all the πs? Who ate all the πs? Who ate, who ate, who ate all the πs?"
'Just because I've become a bit spherical over the years. Archimedes screw those guys. Why don't they go and pick on Euclid, instead? He's a total square.'
'The πs have gone to my arse, but no-one cared before. πs... arse... cared... hang on, there might be something in that!'