With a population 63% Mormon, Utah State has been declared a turn off, bringing in legislation to restrict pornography. A Church official said: ‘We advise filtering the Internet by using golden plates to cover up the offending areas. No one wants the devil in their heart or sperm in their eye.
‘We tell our members to wear knee high socks, plaid shorts and keeping banging on about our faith. This distracts from the actual banging. We’re stopping the hyper sexualisation of teens – although, looking at the average gym sock that bird may have already flown. However, nothing says abstinence like the phrase – Hi, Can I talk to you about God.’