New Homelessness Minister is the Big Bad Wolf

Keir Starmer said there was no conflict of interest with Mr.Wolf's private house blowing business. The PM confirmed that Mr. Wolf had his full backing and was not due to lobbying from the Anti-Pig League.

The new Minister reiterated his commitment to ending homelessness: 'I'll be reducing their numbers to zero by a one in one out policy. For every person made homeless, I eat one. Simple.' Labour are said to be keen to apply the same scheme to NHS waiting lists.

Starmer's corruption and hypocrisy has gone unchecked, admitted one journalist: 'We'll huff and puff but won't say anything.' Meanwhile Mr. Wolf has approved plans for 4 million new affordable homes - all of them straw.

Image: Wix AI