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Piers Morgan beheaded by CNN

A masked executioner, sounding like Wolf Blitzer, is seen speaking to the camera decrying Morgan’s crimes against journalism and smug imperialism. While Morgan is seen visibly shaken, as he reads a prepared statement apologising for being ‘mean’ to Ian Hislop and not punching Kelvin MacKenzie when he had the chance. A CNN extremist explained why ‘Piers Morgan Live’ was now an oxymoron: ‘This was a mercy killing. A mercy to all those poor viewers he had to watch him pontificating on TV.’

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