In the weepy small hours of the weekend, the peoples of the Russian Federation jammed bullying help lines with complaints of harassment by members of NATO. Moscow officials claimed that other nations had blanked them in class. blocked them on Facebook and called them spotty.
The Kremlin complained: ‘Someone had written on our pencil case that Putin smelt of BO and had not started his period yet. We’ve been accused of war crimes, but realty hurts, is being called a dork’. A spokesman for the National Bullying Helpline replied: ‘Yeah, but you were asking for it'.