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Subprime mortgages or a Mars Colony – you can’t have both

One Banker explained: ‘Look, we can fund another frivolous attempt to explore the galaxy, or we can pay for the world’s greatest lap-dance. It’s a matter of priorities. And if we go chasing aliens now, how we going to bail out The Royal Bank of Scotland?’

An irate foreign exchange trader said: ‘Who cares if there is life on Mars or a comet about to hit the earth, I’ve got bills to pay. Can you even imagine the overheads related to maintaining a villa in Tuscany? No? Neither can I, I write it off as a business expense. But that’s not the point!’

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