Trump made chief of the Ramblers

'So, um, where was I?' said a spokes-blitherer for the Ramblers.

'Oh, yes. That's it. We've inducted the President of the United States into the Ramblers and promoted him immediately to being our chief.

'That's because he's proving himself to be one of the most persistent ramblers of modern times.

'For most of us club members, rambling is a weekend hobby - a break from our working lives in which we have to speak briefly and to the purpose.

'President Trump, on the other hand, is spending every day now going on long digressions during important meetings, ranging over acres and acres of irrelevant subject matter for hours on end before reaching any point.

'And Mr Trump's proclivity to ramble is clearly increasing by the week as he slips ever deeper into senile dementia.'

Trump takes the top rambling spot from Boris Johnson, who was told of his demotion while talking to business executives about Peppa Pig World.

At press time, Donald Trump was into the sixth hour of an acceptance speech to fellow ramblers in the Oval Office and had already covered such topics as Sharpies, TV comedians he wanted to imprison, the best Taco Bell restaurants in southern Florida and his top ten pairs of breasts on 1980s soap opera actresses.

Image: Wix AI