Truss announces legalization of drugs "for higher earners"

Updated: Oct 7


Prime minister Liz Truss has announced that the full spectrum of recreational drugs will be legalized for anyone earning over 100,000 pounds a year.


The announcement, made at a late night social gathering of party members and key fundraisers, gained rapturous applause with current rebel-leader-in-chief Michael Gove described as applauding almost "manically" while waving around two glowsticks.


Under further questioning today on the policy, when asked what legalizing cocaine would do to help Britain's economy Liz Truss pointed out that the average family would only pay 2500 pounds for a gas bill. When pressed on how this would actually help the poorer classes she pointed out that if the poor wanted drugs all they had to do was go to prison, where they would be bound to find some for sale.


Kwasi Kwarteng emphasized the importance of the policy by pointing out that if rich people bought so many drugs they just couldn't take them all, then they might give a couple of lines to someone in the street, so the poor would benefit in the medium term.


Story: RichT


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