Uncle Quentin was seen in Smuggler’s Cove, without a mask,’ exclaimed Julian.
‘What a frightful bore,’ said George. ‘Doesn’t he know that Timmy has an undying medical condition? He keeps eating poisoned food’.
They said it couldn’t be done. A new NewsBiscuit annual. Or maybe it was ‘shouldn’t’. That’s right, it shouldn’t be done. In fact, there was a petition. Maybe a march or two? Now that I think about it, there was a Court Order. People chaining themselves to railings. The threat of a military coup.
But we said to hell with them. We were going to publish. Regardless of the suffering and derisory sales. If we could get Brexit done, how hard would it be to write a NewsBiscuit book?
BTW how’s the Brexit thing going?
From the same team that brought you 'Fifteen Years of Typos' comes an extensive anthology of twelve months of fake news from the UKs original fake news site, Newsbiscuit. Over 800 carefully curated comedy fake news articles and more than 700 one-line news gags all together in one volume written by some of the funniest and most creative comedy writers known to work for free.
Articles drawn from September 2020 until August 2021, approximately mirroring events in the real world, include:
Bloke in pub to join Cabinet
NATO to tut and shake their heads at Russia
Second wave of press conferences to hit the UK
National Fiasco Memorial built in the wrong place
Coronavirus will be with us for between two years and forever, say scientists
Biden selects Kamala Harris to be his running-mate and carer
Government finally admits it has 'no idea' why we have daylight saving time
and hundreds more
Five Go Dobbing in the Neighbours makes a great gift for friends and to yourself
A No. 10 spokesbeing has told our reporter that far from inaction over the war in Ukraine, the Prime Minister is intent on studying War and Peace in order to discover the steps that need to be taken for how the war could become peace.
All four volumes are apparently awaiting collection from the Post office after a civil servant refused to accept them as they were addressed to the Prime Minister, a post the civil servant said was a figment of a twisted imagination.
When asked when the PM intends to start reading War and Peace, the aide said "I wouldn't hold your breath, he intends to start it immediately after he's finished A la recherche du temps perdu, a novel Rupert Murdoch told him he should read, but he's stuck on page 3 at the moment, wondering where the tits are.
Previously published 27 March 2022
Image: Newsbiscuit
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