Dr Who is 'pure shite' claims new study

A new study has slammed Dr Who as being "pure shite". Furthermore it goes on to claim it’s only fear of being seen as uncool that stops most people saying what they really think.

One Sci Fi superfan, Simon Carter, said: ‘If I’m being completely honest Dr Who is very much the “Crossroads” of the genre. Its rather stiff, starchy and quintessentially drab British vibe, not to mention shonky special effects, looking like they cost about one pound-fifty per episode, are to blame.

‘Compared to Star Trek it’s dire. But because of the massive hype surrounding the show's puzzling longevity, it’s become completely taboo to slag it off, in much the same way as one daren't even think about criticising athletes since the London 2012; especially the Brownlee Brothers.’

However, Whovian Society Secretary and self-styled Emperor Grombitz of Glarg, Albert Tompkins-Harris, has hit back: ‘DW is a fabulous programme with amazing stories and production values. Were I to choose a phrase to sum it up it would have to be "utter Daleks".'

photo: https://pixabay.com/users/aitoff-388338/

Next Dr. Who/James Bond shortlist down to 50 million

The entire adult population of the UK is still in the running for both iconic roles, all with the necessary acting talent, all except for James Corden.

The fact that anyone could be considered, is a tribute to diversity casting but also a comment on how sh$t Idris Elba’s agent is. Asked about the millions listed, one Producer said: ‘That’s slightly shorter than an NHS waiting list’.

Image: Pixabay/Tumisu

First woman to reach adulthood without committing crime says it's all thanks to Doctor Who

A major milestone was reached yesterday as Annie Briggs from Stevenage became the first woman in history to reach adulthood without committing a single crime. She believes that growing up with a female lead in the only show on television was key to keeping her on the straight and narrow. 'I'm very proud to have achieved this milestone for women,' Briggs said at a special press conference, 'and I owe it all to Jodie Whittaker for playing Doctor Who on TV. Before that, we thought that the moral principles of a fictional time lord could only apply to men, so I might as well just go and kill someone, but now thanks to Jodie we know it's actually women they apply to exclusively.' The news provides a much needed positive boost as society continues to struggle with the sudden onslaught of roaming gangs of young men who, bereft of male role models on television, have taken to the streets looting, murdering and making ritual sacrifices to the Kray twins.

image from pixabay

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