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WW3 postponed due to ban on Arabic numerals


As US President Donald Trump personally deploys bunker busting bombs on Iran by leaning out of a B2 bomber, critics who claim he is kick-starting the next World War have been told it isn't true.


'I have signed an Executive Order today banning the numbers used in World Wars belonging to the United States as historically the losers who named them used Arabic numerals. Hence I have insisted that this big, beautiful World War I have started bigly is to be numbered in American numerals. Nobody can start a World War better than me,' added the President.


Experts have tried pointing out that historically Roman numerals have frequently been used, such as World War I and World War II. 'This would make it World War III,' pointed out one expert. An Executive Order banning the use of either 4 or IV after the words 'World War' is considered entirely unnecessary.


Photo by Karl Callwood on Unsplash

Trump's most recent Executive Orders – Number 5 will not shock you at all



Most people would figure out after searching online that an executive order is a directive by the president of the United States that manages operations of the federal government, that is now wrong. Executive orders can be now used for a whole range of things including crime.


Here are some of the latest bangers from the last few days:

  1. Empathy is now banned in all situations especially disasters

  2. The President can allocate blame to anyone and is only responsible for successes

  3. Gaza to be turned into a carpark for a Trump Hotel

  4. Mount Rushmore will be reworked so it is just Trump's face, when he was 20

  5. An executive order was sent to McDonalds for a Filet-O-Fish and a Diet Coke

  6. Donald J Trump’s star on Hollywood Boulevard is to be bigger than everyone else’s

  7. $100 bills will now have Biden's face on them, oh no, wait….he must have that one mixed up with the super retro impeachment one




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